HAVE WE BEEN MISSING THE CUES?

Middle-aged men divorcing their wives for concubinal relationships with younger women is becoming a common occurrence. Having said that, I am not overlooking the cougar relationships, when I am driving home the point I have in mind. After a while, in a long-term relationship, the element of romance disappears, and it becomes less exciting for the couple to stay in it and if they did, it could be because of the commitments which could be children born out of wedlock or joint businesses or investments or fear of social rebuke. These responsibilities are not enough for a man to be tied down these days and I guess it is the same for women who are tired of fulfilling their roles and responsibilities with nothing rewarding coming their way. Middle-aged family men are a good catch these days as they are usually owners of properties or businesses with considerable savings in their accounts.  

If the younger mistresses thought the middle-aged men are swept off their feet by their physical beauty, they are mistaken. It lasts only till they become weary of such relationships and feel exploited. Besides the romance, it is the innocence, the lack of worldliness, hero-like worship, their ability to command their complete obedience and their characteristic of self-flattery that sustains their interest in the young mistresses. Once the young mistresses demonstrate the maturity and wisdom of older women because of their experiences and awareness of the self-centeredness of their male partners and voice those realizations, they cease to be of interest to men. There are occasions when divorced older men have proposed to their younger mistresses which are decisions born out of the realization that they lack the youthfulness to do better.

Popular media or feature films used to portray wayward men returning to their wives when the truth about being exploited and the virtue of their patient wives’ dawn on them. However, films have also warned women of what a man really desires when it comes to relationships. Responsibilities repel them but romance makes them feel more masculine. A few men feel turned off when their naïve mistresses show a streak of independence, take independent decisions, or receive more attention than them.

Even though I have attached clips from Indian films to prove my argument, these scenarios are not exclusive to just Indians but universal. As long as women do not  labour under illusions when they enter into such alliances, and are clear about what they want out of the relationships, they could emerge unscathed from the age old game between men and women.

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